It is my anniversary today and while passing the local cinema, my wife suggested that we see a film. I haven’t been to the cinema for a long time and despite my reservations I agreed. On entering the lobby, the smell of fresh pop-corn filled our noses and we tried to find out what to watch. The first thing is that you have to know what you want to see because although there is lots of information about what is going to be shown in the future, there is very little information about what is showing at the time other than the title of the film and when the next showing is due.
All the films come from America or are about American culture despite the thriving cinema industry in other countries. I would like to see more variety in the content. How about some World cinema instead of lowest common denominator, special effect laden Hollywood tripe. Then there is the ticket price, £9 per person is just a rip-off especially in the afternoon when there are least number of people. Snack prices are another rip off.
Perhaps one the most annoying things is the adverts and trailers. When you say the film is going to start, here’s a tip, start the bloody film. I don’t want to sit and be bombarded by adverts for 20 mins and then sit through trailers for films that I am never going to see. This wasting of time is just done to try and sell overpriced snacks because bored impatient people will do anything to try and fill the time. Then more adverts about turning your phone off.
The final insult was to be shown an advert against movie piracy before the main film began. Fuck you! I have paid money, and I am watching this film in the cinema and you are preaching to me to not pirate films! What a way to treat the audience.
The only good thing was the size of the screen which was impressive, unfortunately the film was terrible. For the record, it was ‘The Devil Inside’ which was described as a supernatural horror like the Exorcist. Unfortunately it was a documentary style film which was badly acted and with all the priests just reminded me of an episode of Father Ted without the jokes. It was just an awful film. Even the scriptwriters must have got bored halfway through because the film ends with the protagonists having a car crash and the credits roll. This is the equivalent of a bored child’s creative writing essay where they can’t be bothered to write any more and look to end the story by writing, “and then I woke up. It was all a dream.”
With a crap experience like that it is easy to understand why people would rather download a shakey, low quality pirate of the screen showing the back of someone’s head than being fleeced by going to the cinema.
- Pretentious Advert King
- Buxton Water
- Volvic Water 14 Day Challenge Advert
- Citroen C3 Swinging Car Advert